The Seven Deadly Sounds

So I am laid in bed wide awake at stupid o’clock and can’t get back to sleep because there is a snoreasaurus in the bed next to me. And as I lie here wanting to punch said snoring animal because it is driving me nuts, I get to thinking about the sensitivity and irritation that is caused by certain noises.  It must be one of the symptoms of my highly-strung personality, because I am sure most people do not feel the urge to kill rising upon hearing a certain noise!

  1. Snoring – obvious one I know, but this one has to be in the top spot.  I think it has something to do with timing – generally it is when I am trying to sleep, and when I am shattered but can’t sleep through the constant pig grunts that it fills me with despair!
  2. Chewing – the sound of anyone chewing drives me nuts. Doesn’t matter what they are chewing (some people have a particular aversion to people chewing gum), I feel my insides churning up and it is all I can do not to scream at the perpetrator! I think crunching fits into this category too.  Loud crunching of say, cereal, is enough to send me over the edge!
  3. Dripping tap – again another obvious one. We’ve got a leaky tap in the en suite that drip, drip, drips into the bath. If we go to bed and forget to close the bathroom door then I’m done for! If I wake up and that tap is dripping, there’s no going back to sleep for me. 
  4. Cold-related noises – I’m talking coughs, sneezes and sniffles. Wow, that’s a hot topic in this house at the minute with a husband and 2 children full of cold!! With every sniff I want to scream “blow your fekking nose will you!!!”.  Coughing annoys me if it is persistent, and I can’t help myself from barking “go get a drink for gods sake!!!” when it gets too much! Sneezes aren’t too bad, except that my husband has the most annoying attention-seeking-blow-your-head-off kind of sneeze that winds me up if I’m in the wrong kind of mood!!
  5. Buzzing. Not from creatures, but from electrical equipment mainly. We have a lamp that buzzes for some reason. My husband could never hear it, but even with the TV on I would be driven to distraction and have to switch the thing off. We have changed the bulb now, which seems to have rectified the problem.
  6. Whining. Kids. 2 of them. Hearing them whinge at each other and bicker (as siblings often do) drives me nuts!
  7. Clocks. The ticking kind. Again this is limited to the middle of the night when I’m trying to sleep. If I sleep anywhere other than home and there is a ticking clock in the room, I have to remove it or bury it in a drawer somewhere.

There are probably more, so I may add to this at a later stage. For now, there are just the seven deadly sounds that could be enough to incite violence! And I am not a violent person at all. I guess my response to these sounds varies dependant on how much sleep I’ve had, and my mood at any given time. I’m sure someone somewhere could give this anxiety a name (other than me just being plain neurotic!).   For now, I’ve gone into the spare room to try and get some noise-free sleep 😴😴😴

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