I’m scared
So scared I’ll never hold you in my arms
Scared you are going to come to harm, if not before then after and you’ll be taken away.
I have never wished so hard for a day to come.
I just want this to be done, so I can have you here, hear your cry and feel your heartbeat against my chest.
I wish there was some way of knowing,
Confidence that you are in there growing strong enough to fight your way into the world.
I let my guard down, allowed myself to get carried away with pink bows and pretty things –
Your room is beautiful; I sit in there nearly every day, rocking in the chair imagining you are there with me.
And then I imagine coming home without you and I don’t know what I would do if that were to happen.
This journey has been such a long one, and now we’re nearly done I need to know you are going to be alright.
With every ounce you have grown, I have grown to love you more than you will ever know.
And so I need you to fight little one, fight against whatever my body throws your way, and make it into this world ok.
bluemama 
She will be here soon, then you’ll realise all these anxieties were ANT working his/her black magic xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
I sure hope so. Think this miracle needs to happen so I can finally kill ‘her’ off x
LikeLike